The Way of the Warrior – Toltec

In all the American-indian traditions the role of the Warrior, was to lead the Tribe. Only after being chosen because of his deeds and wisdom. The Way of the Warrior is very present in this traditions, and is one of the most important roles to dedicate your life.

Carlos Castaneda opened this world to me with his books. The teachings of the Yaqui Shaman, Don Juan was the first encounter with Shamanism and the mysteries of the secret «knowledge» of the world. His books were so interesting to me, that I almost felt like eating them instead of reading. I felt a real connection with the wisdom found in them, and was only after reading one of his books, that I discovered and decided that I wanted to follow the «Way of the Warrior».

The philosophy behind Carlos Castaneda’s books is often referred as Toltec Tradition. It explains that there is a parallel dimension, only «seen» when you awaken your spirit, by following a very long and hard training. It says that the reality of the world is hidden to the «normal or average» person, and that by becoming a Warrior, you are able to recognize and live in the normal and spiritual world, with the purpose of dissolving completely your physical body into the spiritual realm, before dying.

For doing this the warrior must follow a life of balance, a deep connection to the forces of nature, seen and unseen, live always in the present moment, because the warrior has to know, that death is always hunting him, that every situation of life has to be experienced as a challenge, but even by having the most difficult challenge, the warrior has to know that death will come, without knowing when.

Don Juan says to Carlos in one of his books that his problem is that he believes that he has time. He explains that our time is limited and that we never know when are we really going to die, so he should embrace the present moment and any challenge in his life, and give his all. Death becomes the best friend of the warrior, because is always remembering him to do his best.

One of the main concepts in the Way of the Warrior, is the «Impeccability». Don Juan explains that the warrior should always aim for it. Meaning first that word and action are one, that the warrior never backs out of his word, and he always take every challenge as a death or life situation.

In oriental traditions we find the concept of Karma or Law of cause and effect. But in the Toltec tradition this is not believed, they believe that we are always in the «present», that past and future doesn’t exist, only being constructions of our perception and mind. If we think deeply into this, we start to understand also that there are no good or bad decisions, that there are only decisions and challenges to be upfronted.

“We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” – Carlos Castaneda

Another fundamental aspect in the Way of the Warrior, is that the Warrior has to let go his self-importance. And only by doing this, he will be free and discover his true power. What makes us be out of our balance, offended or upset, is the belief in our self-importance, this belief makes us take personally everything that happens to us, and pull us out of the present moment and out of «attention», this loosens our inner power and the capacity to act as warriors.

Finally, the Warrior is a hunter of power, and he practices everything in his hands to be able to attain the most of it, because is the inner power that drives our will in the spiritual dimension. Without it, we lose ourselves in it, the forces of nature takes us away and we remain in a state of half alive and half dead.

The first and most basic practice to attain internal power is by attention, first of all focusing through the 5 senses, until we are able to silence completely our mind, and later, the attention under a state of total internal silence, there we awaken as true warriors and we are able to cross into the spiritual dimension, and start the journey into the infinite.

The Way of the Warrior, is long and difficult, it makes you confront all your fears, it makes you feel the terror of being alive. Only by being in constant attention and impeccability we are able to follow it until the end. The Warrior decides and acts, without hesitation, with all his might, into the infinite world.

The Way of the Warrior – Bushido

What does it mean to follow the Way of the Warrior, according to Bushido?

When I was 15 years old, watched a TV demonstration of Hankido, a martial art from Korea, based on Hapkido. I felt immediately attracted to it, and a few days later convinced one of my best friends to go and take a look, which resulted in almost 3 years of practice. This was my first conscious encounter with the Way of the Warrior.

Everything regarding martial arts and oriental philosophies filled my mind and my heart, and made me explore into them with big curiosity. This brought me naturally to Japanese warriors, the Samurais, and for the first time I had a feeling like, «maybe if there is a past life, I was surely one». Which is a very strange feeling, why somebody from a south american country, would feel such a big connection to a way of life originated in a very different country and time. There are not many logical explanations, but I am very sure that most of the people have had this «experience».

The Samurais, followed the Bushido, a philosophy originated in Japan, which mixed confucianism, shintoism (japanese shamanism) and zen buddhism. It reflects a very high standard of how a Samurai code of Life has to be and followed. The main teachings of it are resumed in 7 virtues that every Samurai (Warrior) should follow carefully and with discipline.

I believe that the Way of the Warrior, is a theme that captivates many, men and women equally. There are plenty of books, teachers and movies that talk about it. And I truly believe, that when you feel yourself so connected to something, you should study and try your best to understand it.

There are many philosophical and spiritual ways in our world, that explain how to follow the Way of the Warrior. Some of them very similar to each other, and I invite you to explore and have your own experience of what does it mean to be a Warrior.

Here I let you some books that could interest you, about Bushido and the Way of the Warrior.

Books

A Fitness Nomad in Tulum

I was in Chile having a successful job as personal trainer but I felt something was missing. I had this deep feeling of travelling and see for myself, how could be to travel and work as a fitness coach in other country, in a beautiful and magical place, close to the sea, and surrounded by nature. I really thought about doing this for a long time, and after a year, I threw myself to the experience.

This article is meant for anyone who is wanting to do the same. Maybe you watched a motivating video in your instagram, or maybe you have a friend that is doing it too. Maybe you feel you have accomplished almost everything society wanted from you, and now you are looking for a change. Something more sintonized with your spirit.

The reasons can be multiple, only you know what is better for you. So I will just leave part of my experience here, so it serves to you.

Why Tulum?

Many people asked me when I was already there. I would say, that it was a mixture of intuition and circumstances. First, I had Mexico in mind long time ago to visit. Second, I wanted to go to the caribbean sea. Third, I was looking for a place with nature and interesting things to do, at the same time, didn’t wanted to go to a big city or to a remote place, just something in the middle. Fourth, the first time I was in Tulum, during my travel through Mexico, I had this special feeling of «I would live here», and even I knew amazing places after this first visit, none of them gave me the same sensation, so I went back to Tulum and decided that I would stay and do the bet (this decision was the most difficult and transformed my life forever, for a better life).

How did I start?

I just sent email to all hotels and Yoga studios and Fitness centers I could find in a google search, presenting myself with a little resume and a link to my social media and websites, asking for an interview or chance to work there. Went knocking door by door, doing the same. Until someone gave me the chance to start, and then everything just went forward like a snowball.

Would I do this again?

Yes! Totally, but with some considerations and deeper goals in mind that just having the experience. Because is never enough, when you are a seeker, you discover that there is a part of you that only shines when you set foot out of your confort zone and do what you love. Its risky, its dangerous, its difficult, and lonely. But at the same time is one of the best experiences in life for you self steem, for your soul, for your personal and professional growth.

You see, I had in mind a dream. My dream was to have a carreer jump into an international public, use all the skills I got and learn new. Reach new people and add them into my life, not just as figures in the social media, but as a real human, doing real things. Not only locally, but globally.

My suggestions to you:

  1. Learn and use new languages. In Tulum, english is a must, because of the international audience. You have to be able to give classes in english and if you know more languages, they add up. When you contact possible places to work in, do it in english.
  2. Have a medical insurance, just in case. I had dengue and some infections due to street food, so is good that you consider this.
  3. Don’t be afraid. Nobody knows you, so consider yourself starting from zero and give yourself the chance to be who you are. There is nobody to impress. Be yourself, do what you love, show up and give your best.
  4. Consider the visa permits to stay in the country you are visiting and have the necessary money, to go out and come in again if you plan to stay longer. Also have a money reserve or a ticket to go back to your country just in case there is an emergency.
  5. Choose the right season. Places like Tulum in which many people go for vacations, has of course high and low season. If you are planning to go for the high season, expect to have a lot of competition, many other yoga, meditation and fitness teachers and alike, want to do the same. I started in the lower season, this made it a little easier to find a job, and if you focus on doing your work right, and in positive relationships with the bussiness owners, you can expect to have better oportunities for the high season.
  6. Enjoy it. You never know if this is going to be the last time you do something like this. The amount of things we can really put under our control is so few that really, don’t stress if things don’t go the way you planned. Just go with the flow, enjoy the ride and be literally like a sponge. Absorb all the experiences, into you, keep the beautiful and good people in your heart and of course your social media, and let go everything else.

In the end, the main actor and creator of your life is you. Follow your heart and intuition, it will serve you as a compass when you feel lonely or lost, avoiding trouble and dangers that may show up in your journey.

Be aware of some people, because not everything that shine is gold. Many people are waiting for persons with their heart open, to take some kind of advantage, so don’t loose yourself, remember who you are, your roots and the people who love you back in your country. Because you are going to be the ambassador of everyone and everything you learnt at home.

I wish that if you are reading this, to take the decision to jump out, DO IT, fearlessly and with love in your heart. Don’t travel to escape your reality, don’t explore the world with unresolved relationships and feelings. Do it because you are complete, and you feel ready to give your best out there. And if at any moment, you need someone to express or communicate your thoughts and feelings. You can write to me, I will be happy to answer.

Love.

Segundo video del Cenote, esta vez un salto desde lo alto!!

Posted by Félix Fuenzalida on Sunday, June 24, 2018

Follow your Heart

Undoubtfully, our heart always knows our hidden truth. For some reason this will always apply, regardless of any situation. If we could just focus on what our heart and intuition has to say for us, we could really walk our daily life without all the mumbling that our mind has. 

One day a friend asked me what did I do with all my preocupations when speaking about decisions for our life. And I just told her, «I quit them». Just plainly and simply, I was cornered to a position in which whatever I could do, would solve none of my problems. And at this situation the only thing I could really do was to quit thinking about my problems and just «go with the flow» with whatever decision I took.

Suddenly this became a mayor wisdom for me, because the only thing left for me, was a huge amount of determination that I could really use in my everyday life to just go through whatever it was tossed to me. It was’t that my problems disapeared from me, I just understood one simple principle, «the only thing i really had, was my present moment». And at this level, when you understand this and you really start living it, then every preocupation, fear and doubt, just go away. You stop thinking about what might be, and you start doing what you can with what you’ve got. And life turns simply into a matter of doing and following this energy of determination and will. Like if suddenly you could grab the wave, and you would just flow with it, without thinking about anything else.

I’ve been travelling and having deep conversations through all my journeys with different people from all over the world, and many of them, eventually would say me something like, «wow, Félix, you are so inspiring». And this, far from getting me into feeling like a better person, just make me realize that probably is because of the passion and positivity from which I tell my stories.

One day I just realized that our past is imposible to change, but the way you talk about your past, is completly changeable. The words you choose to describe how your life is and how is going to be, are 100% up to you. And after this I just focused on changing the way I saw myself. My grandmother would always say, «It all depends on the point of view, from where you choose to see». And this profound grandma wisdom, was one of the keys to turn my life into a positive and heartfull experience.

Because whatever you are doing, where you are living, whatever your job is, your carreer or your lifestyle. There are two facts imposible to deny, one is that you are alive, and the second is that you are going to die. So whatever you choose from now on, I would really implore to you, that you start following your heart from here on.

Stop making fearfull decisions, stop making excuses, stop acting and playing. Start doing what you heart tells you to do. And you will discover that our heart, is always positive, is always full of love and is always right. 

Let yourself be inspired by life, let yourself be.

Purpose

Once upon a time, there was a child, who would look into the stars and ask, why am I here? For what reason I came to live in the place I do? And this questions became an important thing to find out, so at the age of 11, I started to be interested in philosophy and different ways of understanding what was going on, why should I go to school, or why was important to do what adults where stating to be “important”. And what happened is that, I never found any answers, not until I was already an adult in my mid twenties. Even going to University, to study and deepen my knowledge in phylosophy, could not help me find any clue about life itself and my own purpose. So my decision at that moment was to drop it, and just start having all kind of experiences for which, someday, they would help me comprehend and not only understand, all that “phylosophycal knowledge”.

After some years, had a relationship break up, and also a life changing experience. One day, just as normal as any other, I took a profound and deep decision with myself. To love who I was, no matter what. To accept everything I was at that very moment, and open up to feel that life loved me as part of everything else. That day, I decided to start making decisions with my heart and with love as my number one pillar. Nothing that others could do or say about me, would matter to me anymore, and the only one that I would listen, would be myself. So that day, I learned the best truth of life, one can never love others more than how we love ourselves. So the first priority, is to understand, accept, be honest with, respect, trust, and take full responsability for oneself.

Of course, many experiences came in the form of tests, to grow into this decision, and still feel that there is a long way to go, regarding self love, but I am thankfull to all what happened in my past, because is thanks to those experiences, the good ones and the bad ones, that I am here today, writting this, and looking forward for a life full of purpose, love and freedom.

In my late twenties I was again in a critical point, this time regarding work. I felt so emty at the current job I had, and also the current lifestyle I was carrying. The only thing I knew, is that I wanted that my job, would be on the benefit of others, and not just a matter of making money, paying bills and grow old. How difficult can be, to have the life that you really want? When you are in that messy point, in which you need that job to live, but you feel empty as a dead shell, and all you do to stop that emptyness, in becoming bigger and bigger, are temporary “fun stuff”. Until one day, I realized, that even those things, are as empty as everything else I was doing.

So I started to use all the knowledge on Human Development, Leadership, Coaching, Buddhism and Shamanism, that I had been learning those years, Coached myself and received mentoring, to find the right answer.  Finding your own life purpose, can be difficult, but finding a job that you really like, has to be easier. And of course, finding both, a purpose to live and a job that you love, have almost the same answer. So I took my chances and decided to reinvent my self as a professional, and from that point forward, everything became clearer, my footsteps became stronger and the vision of a life of purpose, started to seem posible.

Then I reached another moment, in which I took another life changing decision, that would be, making physical activity (training), a priority and a fundamental pillar for my life. On that day I had a confrontation with myself, because at the same time I was thinking, that I should train more often and make it part of my lifestyle, my mind would give me all kind of crappy excuses, such as, “I have no time, I have no money, etc”. And looking at a bonfire I shut off that mind, and replied, “hey, you don’t need money to go to a park and do some squats and pushups, or run a mile. And regarding time, you just need to priorize it, organize your agenda, and do it.” I mean, you only need motivation, and there is, when i started to understand my lack of motivation towards life and my current job, and that strong desire to find a purpose. I could see with certainity, all what I needed was to make the decision and start doing it, right now, so two days later, i started and kept doing it until today (6 years later).

Thanks to training and determination, I developed skills like, self motivation, resilence, perseverance, consistency. I became more tenacious, my self-steem improved, all together with some physical changes, becoming stronger and braver. Training taught me that “fear”, is not my enemy, unless I let it, it is a teacher and a friend that shows me all those things that I could be good at, but that I just need to invest more time and more effort, because if you follow a good training program and eat healthy, you will get the results you want, the only thing you need to do, is to keep doing it, no matter what.  So the way to make fear into your ally, is by trusting who you are, what are you doing, and what you want to become, and stop making excuses.

The second good thing about all this training, is that I discovered a new passion, which is coaching and training people. For some years I always wanted to develop professionally as a Life Coach and was doing it for some time. Training and the passion for it, gave me a way to make a new carreer, this two skills, together with my tireless search for a deep meaning of life, gave me the vision I was looking for as a purpose. What if I could be able to support and help others to find themselves, find their purpose and meaning of life, be there to motivate and inspire with my own life as an example, that everything is posible, that everything we dream can be done, if we just do it. The same way, my mentors and coaches where there for me, I dreamed of becoming a human being like them, someone whom to look up and receive inspiration, human wisdom, love and caring. Be completly congruent with my own ideals, emotions and actions. I knew this was no easy task, almost like a never ending one. But one of many thoughts I had, that pushed me to do it, was that, “If i am alive, I have the chance to do it, and I just need to believe in my self and my dream, and devote to it, breath it every day, and never surrender, even if things get hard”.

If I train my self physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, I can be that human being, I thrive to be, I can be my own light and show to others, that there is always a way to make things happen, that life can be fullfilling, that the job we have, can become one of purpose and hope, that like the sun shines every morning, we all can do it too. I know, that there are others like me, with the same motivation, I know that there are millions of people wandering if they can become aware, and fullfill their hopes and dreams. And for sure I know that is possible to do it, every day until our time of death, we can live our dreams.

Coach Félix Fuenzalida

Dreaming The Perfect Beach – Part 3 – Tayrona

In this journey that seems imposible to end, i found myself in Colombia. A land of mysteries, great food, beautiful women, with a magic of its own, and of course, one of the most paradise like places i ever known, its called, «Parque Nacional Tyrona».

Started this trip in Bogotá, where i stayed 5 days in a friends apartment. It is a nice city, big and noisy as any capital you would go to. It has a lot of green all around, and the people are lively. It reminded me some places of my own city, Santiago, but its different though. The weather changes a lot, in one day you can have rain, wind and sun. Its inhabitants, «bogotanians», say it is a cold weather, but when you are used to colder places such as Chile, it just feels like spring.

In the first place i didn’t have a plan to follow (no big surprise coming from me), so i just improvised through it. After thinking what would i do after being in Bogotá, i decided to go to the Tyrona Park, at the north of the country. So i just bought the ticket, and next morning i was flying to my new destiny.

The plane arrived and when i got down, i could feel the warm and humid weather of tropic. I was way too overdressed for that place. Picked up a taxi and told the driver, «hey look my plan is to know Santa Marta (the city where you have to go to, in order to get to the park), and then go to the park». He replied: «why don’t you go direct to the park?, i mean, don’t loose time in here, just go there, is cheaper and nicer.», «oh well i said, why not, but lets just go to the drugstore first». Bought there some water, sun screen and repellent. And then we just went straight to the park.

big treeArrived at the main entrance, had lunch in a local restaurant at the side of the road and then just went into it. They made me watch a 15 minutes video of the park, very boring, and then gave a speech of the things you must not do, like wander around the jungle at night, or out of the trails. Swimming in dangerous areas, make fire, etc, etc.

Started to walk with my camping bag, it wasn’t heavy, but the heat and humidity, made it a little harder. A car stopped and hitchhiked me, towards the real entrance for the trails. i was feeling very excited, because everything was new to me, i could recognize a nice smell of plants and herbs, very sweet, mixing with the sea air. Everything was like those adventures that you don’t want them to finish.

Walked around 2 hours through the jungle, could watch some monkeys playing around over the trees and lots of lizards all over. Finally got to my destiny, named, «Cabo de San Juán». There i stayed 5 nights sleeping in a hammock and chilling at the beach, did a trekking to an indian town in the middle of the jungle and other beaches and the most important thing, was that i could get to know  new friends.

This was my first vacations i would take since started with my bussiness as a Personal Trainer, lot of thing happened to me since then, some up and downs regarding my last relationship, and lots of work. So this time off, with myself, was way too great, many people asked me why i would travel alone, why not a girlfriend or a friend. But i just kept answering, «i want time with myself, in a foreign place, where i can really enjoy things in a clearer way».

And this was a perfect place for that. When i got there, i could notice, there were lots of travellers, from different parts of the world, specially europeans. Not as many «colombians» one could expect. Every day would arrive 2 or 3 boats full of people that would stay just for the day. So paradise was invaded with people. Before dawn, they would leave, and just stay a few. Those were the peacefull times.

One thing that had my relax taken away, was the long waits for everything, breakfast, beers, lunch, juice, bathroom, showers. You must do lines for everything, and after the third day, you start feeling a little tired of that. I mean, if you are looking to relax, you don’t expect to wait so much for everything. But it all depends in your inner self, so it was a good oportunity to practice tolerance and patience.

In the other hand, that is one of the most beautiful beaches i have ever known. Paradise it self made just to receive as a bliss of life. A place to heal, to relax, to be quiet. If you can find a great place to make a wish, what ever is it. Do it there, you won’t regret it. The calmness of the sea, its warmth, invites you to play, be thankfull and enjoy life as a sacred thing.

There is a big part of myself, that can be described as «introvert». But when i know people, i am very «extrovert». So most of the time, i was just in silence. But also made new friends. It was great, everyone there is just passing by, so every minute is precious to share with this humans, you get along with. So there is no big time to do «small talk», i would prefer to talk about their life’s point of view, dreams, experiences, spirituality, love. And for anyone that knows me, thats no big difference from my usual tendency, but not everyone have the same motivation, so usually i would have to adapt, and talk about nonsense. But in this oportunity, that was not the case, again, you are having a conversation in a tropical paradise with a «stranger», so why would i talk about «nonsense», that would be nonsense!

Anyway, for those precious human beings i met there, thank you. You made my trip better. Because, in the end, what really stays with you, what ever happens, is your experience of life. One could say, humans are this, or that. We don’t know if we were born from alien technology, from god or just a result of evolution. Its hard to define ourselves. What we are certan to know is that, we are here being, and for me, thats a big truth. We are at some point between the smallest particle of an atom and the bigest galaxy cluster you could find.

Thanks Tayrona, thanks Colombia, thanks life. Until the next trip.

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¿Por qué somos infelices?

¿Hay alguna diferencia entre el agua del océano y el agua del río, o entre el agua que sale de la llave o el vapor que emana al descongelarse el frío de la mañana?, ¿Es diferente el agua de mi cuerpo al agua del tuyo?, ¿Soy diferente de tí?, ¿Soy diferente hoy al yo del ayer, o al yo de mañana?

La causa primordial de la infelicidad está radicada en esa sensación o sentimiento que emana al creer que algo nos falta, que estamos separados de lo que nos rodea. Esta desconexión casi intrínseca en nuestra sociedad produce ansiedad, y es nuestra inhabilidad para lidiar con ella, la que nos enferma, física, mental y espiritualmente.

Somos infelices por que no sabemos aceptar esta ansiedad, y la agrandamos, transformándola en miedo. La convertimos en algo externo, al verla proyectada en otra cosa que no seamos nosotros mismos, como el miedo a perder nuestra casa, nuestro trabajo, nuestra pareja o nuestra vida.

Sentimos miedo, y este nos presiona convirtiéndose descontroladamente en más angustia. Llevándonos a un estado conocido como «estrés». Se desborda y toma control de nuestras emociones, llevándonos por corrientes vertiginosas, donde nos perdemos y agrandamos la sensación de estar desconectados de nosotros mismos. Nos consolamos e intentamos remediar esto, al intentar conectar con otros a nuestro alrededor, al intentar conectar con tendencias o modas. Nos entregamos por completo a lo que el mundo externo nos ofrece y entonces nos vemos convertidos, usando formas y máscaras «compradas», como si fueran propias y creyendo que conforman nuestra identidad.

Pero muy en el fondo sabemos que eso no somos nosotros y el día a día con sus problemas habituales, alegrías momentáneas y sentimientos pasajeros, nos distrae. Y en la distracción somos reyes de todo lo conocido, vivimos y nos vanagloriamos de lo que hacemos, de lo que creamos y de lo que creemos también. Porque preferimos vivir eternamente y comodamente distraidos de la consciencia antes que comenzar a aceptar el vacío en el cual vivimos.

Buscamos valores, propósitos, sueños, metas y aun así, el vacío permanece, y en él, mantenemos la incertidumbre de lo desconocido. Evitamos mirar, porque sabemos que no podemos ver realmente. Y si fuésemos capaces de ver, entonces todo en lo que creemos y por lo que vivimos, se derrumbaría, pues hemos montado un espectáculo, hemos elegido roles para estar aquí, comodamente, sin saber verdaderamente, quién es el que está aquí.

Somos infelices, y hay que aceptarlo. Porque nunca aprendimos a ser o a estar felices. Porque ni si quiera sabemos qué es lo que eso significa. Y nos conformamos comodamente con repetir la frase célebre de algún poeta o filósofo, como si verdaderamente lo hubieramos dicho nosotros, después de una experiencia real de felicidad plena y pura.

Más bien copiamos  en todo lo posible, la felicidad que vemos proyectada en el otro, entonces nace la competencia. El deseo nos gobierna, y el enojo nos consume, cada vez que el otro logra algo y nosotros no. Perdemos el control, porque creemos tener el control.

Comparación, competencia, celos, envidia, miedo, egoísmo, avaricia… Cada día sentimos esto, cada día hacemos algo para no volver a sentirlo, repetidamente, volvemos a sentirlo, ya que sin importar lo que hagamos, estamos cazando nuestra propia cola.

Somos infelices porque estamos viendo el mundo con los ojos cerrados. Estamos navegando sin velas ni remos, ni motor. Estamos a la deriva en el mar de nuestra propia ignorancia. Estamos a merced de nuestra angustia y ansiedad, de nuestro miedo a la muerte, al rechazo y al abandono. Y no existe un solo guía en el que podamos confiar, pues, estamos a merced del ego, que nos embauca y nos hace desconfiar. Principalmente, de nosotros mismos y de la vida.

¿Quieres dejar de ser infeliz?

Abraza tus miedos, acepta el vacío de tu corazón, permite que se expanda, permite que siga siendo vacío. No busques más, pues ya sabes que no hay nada. Ahora simplemente vive en el vacío, y entonces aparecerá para tí, el presente. Ningún color, ninguna forma, ninguna edad, ni cargo, ni bien material, ni ser amado, te llenará, ni estará contigo para siempre. Permite que el dolor se exprese en tí, así como la alegría. Permite al vacío y libera el silencio. Ahora sólo respira y vive.

La vida es evidente. Vívela como realmente es. Tu camino es aquel que haces paso a paso, momento por momento. Agradece cada instante y da al mundo aquello que hayas recibido a cambio.

3 Habilidades para el Éxito

Si bien podríamos hacer una larga lista de recursos, habilidades, conocimientos, etc para conseguir el éxito, de la índole que sea. Creo que hay 3 habilidades clave para conseguirlo. Y digo habilidades, por que no son simples características, sino que también son desarrollables por medio de la práctica correcta.

Lo primero es saber que significa el éxito para mí. Ya que sino, estaremos viviendo y cumpliendo el éxito que nos imponga nuestro jefe, nuestra familia o nuestro gobierno de turno. El éxito, es algo personal, se respira, se vive, como la sangre que corre por las venas, se siente como la tierra bajo los pies o como el calor del fuego en la piel. No es una meta, no es un destino, sino un estado y hasta no comprender esto, nunca lo alcanzaremos.

Ejercicio #1 – ¿Qué es el éxito para mí?

Escríbe en no más de 5 lineas lo que tu consideras que es el éxito en este momento de tu vida. Leelo en voz alta y siente tus propias palabras. Si es que logras sentir ese calor interior que te hace sentir exitoso, entonces eso es. Si no, entonces vuelve a intentarlo, inspírate antes de hacerlo.

Motivación

La primera habilidad para el éxito es aprender a estar motivado. Sin importar que esté sucediendo a nuestro alrededor. Si permitimos que la negatividad nos domine, entonces no tendremos la fuerza para superar los desafíos que tengamos delante nuestro. Y para eso hay muchas maneras de hacerlo, cada uno debe ser capaz de despertar la Automotivación necesaria para seguir adelante, para despertarse temprano, para acostarse tarde, para esforzarse un poco más, etc.

Nadie más que tu es el responsable de hacer esto y sin importar como lo hagas, debes hacerlo, es tu compromiso y responsabilidad número 1. Nada ni nadie, ni tu mismo deben cohartar tu motivación. Más que darles recomendaciones de como hacerlo, quiero darles preguntas necesarias para esto.

Ejercicio #2 – ¿Para qué quiero tener éxito?

Preguntate para qué quieres hacerlo. Si no tienes una visión, si no tienes un sueño, si no tienes al menos la esencia del aroma que persigues, entonces como vas a mantenerlo cuando todo se ponga dificil y la vida te de vueltas de arriba para abajo. Las personas exitosas, son recordadas por que apesar de todo, mantuvieron su motivación, continuaron a pesar de sus dudas y a pesar de que todo el mundo les decía que no, que era imposible, que era pésima idea.

Persistencia

La persistencia es sin duda, la habilidad más importante para conseguir todo lo que queremos. Para ser ese que queremos ser. La persistencia es un arte, porque requiere de otras habilidades y actitudes, como el esfuerzo, la paciencia, la fluidez, la inteligencia y astucia para que a pesar de posibles dificultades u obstrucciones que se presenten en nuestro andar, sigamos con la disciplina que nos hemos propuesto. Exige tener motivación, tener visión, tener agallas para ir más allá de nuestra zona de confort, ir más allá de lo que nunca hemos ido. Adentrarnos profundamente en la experiencia pura, sin conocimiento y a pesar de eso, continuar, incansablemente.

La persistencia es una habilidad clave y así como la motivación, es responsabilidad personal, aprender a desarrollarla. Un músico o un deportista sin persistencia, nunca lograrán sus sueños. Un científico, un emprendedor o empresario o simplemente un niño que quiere un futuro mejor para su familia, sin persistencia, no llegarán al destino que buscan.

Esto lo sabemos, pero muy en el fondo, tenemos pereza, nos distraemos con facilidad, nos excusamos y dejamos para otro momento lo que podríamos estar haciendo hoy. Nos aterra ser nosotros mismos, afrontar la adversidad que sea y persistir. Nos acomodamos, buscamos seguridad y vivimos de fantasías, «si fuera millonario…», «si viviera en otro país…», «si tuviera una pareja que me apoyara…». Buscamos pretextos para dejarnos estar.

Ejercicio #3 – Encuentra el vehículo correcto

Si ya sabes en que quieres tener éxito y ya tienes la motivación para comenzar, crea un plan de acción en donde establezcas cuanto tiempo a la semana vas a dedicarle a esto. Por ejemplo si fuera hacer ejercicio o tocar un instrumento, define 2 o 3 sesiones de 1 hora a la semana y comprometete por al menos 3 meses cumplir al 100%. Si lo logras, entonces estarás un paso más adelante. Poco a poco irás desarrollando más tu persistencia, resiliencia, paciencia, fluidez, astucia e inteligencia. Aprenderás a mantenerte automotivado, ya que verás que cada día será diferente y necesitarás el esfuerzo para comenzar como si fuera la primera vez. Se flexible y firme, ya que aveces las circunstancias nos obligan a modificar el plan, pero no puede volverse esto una excusa para no hacerlo, pase lo que pase, cumple con tu meta semanal.

¿Que pasa si no lo logro?. Persiste. Verás que hay una gran diferencia entre «intentar» y «hacer». Mientras la primera palabra solo describe una intención, la segunda, describe la acción misma.

[embedyt]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fktfTU5i22U[/embedyt]

Consistencia – Excelencia

Dar lo mejor de sí. Competir sólo con uno mismo. Saber que hoy tengo la oportunidad de ser mejor que el yo de ayer. Buscar la impecabilidad en nuestras acciones. No hacer las cosas por deber, por necesidad. Hacerlo porque a pesar de que estemos haciendo y para quién, hacerlo lo mejor posible. Eso es lo que ha caracterizado a culturas como la Germana y la Japonesa en su búsqueda de la excelencia y podemos ver como los productos que disfrutamos de ambos países, así como su arte, arquitectura, música, literatura y poesía, son reconocidas en todo el mundo. Y esta búsqueda incensante, no de la perfección, sino de la honestidad y pasión máxima que un ser humano puede vertir en todo lo que hace, es lo que nos diferenciará, es lo que nos traerá reconocimiento, es lo que nos llevará al éxito.

No se trata sólo de tener motivación y persistencia, sino que también, tener ritmo, ser consistente, buscar siempre mejorar, no conformarnos. ¿Si no diste lo mejor de tí, entonces como sabrás si podrías haber tenido un resultado mejor?. Si te decides a hacer algo, ¿Para qué hacerlo más o menos, cuando podrías hacerlo lo mejor posible?, Si no vas a terminar lo que comenzaste, ¿Para qué entonces comenzaste?, ¿Sólo para darte cuenta que eso no era lo que querías?, Comenzar es tan importante como terminar. Cada vida tiene un ciclo, las oportunidades no se presentan 2 veces de la misma manera y con las mismas circunstancias. El momento que vives, es irrepetible, el «ahora» no volverá. Entonces ¿Qué vas a hacer?.

Ejercicio #4 – Se impecable

Los Budistas nos ofrecen su sabiduría y nos hablan de que existen 3 dimensiones del actuar humano. Pensamiento, Palabra y Cuerpo. Y ser impecable significa serlo, en estas 3 dimensiones. Eso nos lleva a la coherencia y por consiguente, encontramos reciprocidad. Logramos los resultados que tenemos de acuerdo al grado de impecabilidad que hay en estas 3 dimensiones. Toma cada decisión y cada acción desde tu pensamiento, desde tu palabra y desde tu cuerpo. Entonces no habrá división, no habrá incoherencia, muy por el contrario habrá unión y realización, por que a pesar de que esta acción no haya sido lo que en el fondo estabas buscando. Habremos ganado experiencia, y nos habremos empoderado como para tomar otra decisión y emprender cualquier otra acción.

Coaching para el éxito

Si lo que has leido te parece significativo, te parece coherente y quisieras dar un paso más allá, puedo ayudarte, con mis servicios de Coaching, para que aprendas más sobre el éxito, para que descubras qué es lo que significa para tí, para que te empoderes y te mantengas motivado y logres persistir el tiempo necesario, dando lo mejor de tí, y así consigas los resultados que realmente mereces, en cualquier ámbito de tu vida. Profesional, personal, emocional, intelectual o espiritual. Porque en la magnificencia del ser humano, podemos lograr lo que nos propongamos y devolverle al mundo, tood aquello que la vida nos ha dado a nosotros, para estar donde estamos.

Escríbeme a coach@felixfuenzalida.com o deja un comentario en esta página y te contestaré a la brevedad posible.

Coaching de los 8 Pétalos

El 2016 ya comenzó y avanzará sin prisa. Cada uno de nosotros vivirá significativamente este nuevo año y de esta experiencia podremos reír, llorar, aprender, etc.

La actitud con la que vivamos este nuevo año y la claridad que tengamos de los diferentes aspectos de nuestra vida y de las metas que nos propongamos, definirán los resultados que alcancemos. Es por eso que es bueno durante los primeros 12 días de Enero meditar sobre estos aspectos, elegir nuestras metas y la actitud correcta, pase lo que pase, sin desistir, siempre con gratitud y apertura a las sorpresas que la vida nos deparará este año.

Toma una flor, elige un pétalo, pide un deseo y sóplalo al viento.

Es momento de soñar, es momento de imaginar. Plasmarlo en un dibujo, en tu agenda o en tu pared. Plasmarlo en un Plan de Acción. Y comenzar a trabajar por eso que deseaste!

En el proceso de Coaching de 8 Pétalos, te voy a ayudar a definir cada área de tu vida, que metas y sueños tienes, y a ponerlo en movimiento, en la acción, para que todo lo que deseaste sea concebido.

Somos los responsables de lo que hacemos y lo que proyectamos. No depende de nadie más que de nosotros mismos. ¿Para que esperar un año más a ir por tus sueños, si puedes comenzar ahora?

Escríbeme y atrévete a soñar, con los pies en la tierra, y la vista en el cielo.

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Homenaje a mi Padre

Decidí escribir un artículo en homenaje a mi amado Padre, y me lo tomo primero como una forma de agradecerle a él la vida que me dió. También es una forma de rescatar todo lo positivo que él ha generado en mi vida, todos esos rasgos que tengo y que son espejos del modelaje paternal que recibí durante mi infancia y adolescencia.

Para comenzar me declaro a mí mismo, un rebelde, con y sin causa, en momentos de lucidez y en momentos de confusión. Y la primera persona con la que me rebelé, fuiste tú. Ahora a mis 33 años, veo que lo hice en esos momentos como una forma de sentirme dueño de mis decisiones, pero en un acto de sinceridad, lo hice también para decirte, mírame aquí estoy. Quería simplemente llamar tu atención, y sentir que me aceptabas.

A veces es difícil reconocer que lo que en verdad queremos es amor. Y es tan fundamental esta necesidad humana, de sentirnos conectados al amor, a través de quienes nos lo enseñaron y mostraron desde nuestro nacimiento. Siento que es hasta más importante que el mismo aire que respiramos, y que por variadas razones, no siempre logramos sentir esa conexión.

Esta desconexión que tuve por muchos años en relación a tí, me hizo sentir en muchos momentos, soledad. Una soledad vacía que me costaba comprender, y me engullía en angustia, tristeza y rabia. Sentir que estás siendo rechazado por la persona que te dio la vida, es un símil al suicidio, a perder toda esperanza de vida, a perderse a sí mismo, encontrando poco significado para mantenerse de pie y seguir hacia adelante.

Aunque dicen que la naturaleza es sabia y nos da justo lo necesario para crecer y aprender, me hubiera gustado sentir que estabas de mi lado, en esa edad en la que más lo necesitaba. Cuando poco o nada entendemos del mundo, y en vez de sentirte como mi enemigo,  sentir que con amor me enseñabas a tener coraje, a confiar en mí mismo, sin importar las dificultades que vinieran. Simplemente no te puedo puedo culpar, ya que te esforzaste trabajando de domingo a domingo, para darnos a mi y mis hermanos, la mejor vida posible, con las mejores posibilidades y siempre dándonos la oportunidad de elegir qué era lo mejor para nosotros, sin ser impositivo ni controlador.

Tengo un espíritu de guerrero, fuerte y sabio, y eso me ha llevado hasta el hombre que soy hoy. Y te agradezco que hayas sido como fuiste. Ahora me doy cuenta que si me hubiera gustado sentirme aceptado, que me lo hubieras hecho saber, que mis decisiones eran válidas para tí y que las respetabas. En vez de criticarlas o juzgarlas. Al final, hoy, puedo ver que lo has hecho, hemos madurado juntos como Padre e Hijo, y puedo decirte estas cosas a la cara.

Un gran amigo y mentor espiritual, me dijo una vez; «La aceptación es la llave para la felicidad». Y esta frase que me acompaña desde ese entonces, me ha dado fuerza, ánimo y despertado en mí, un sentimiento interno de compasión por los demás. Y es esta práctica de la aceptación la que me lleva a escribirte hoy, honrarte en este espacio, tan íntimo y personal. Decirle al mundo lo importante que eres para mí. En verdad deseo que estas palabras nos sirvan para estar más unidos hoy y que les sirvan a otros que han se hayan sentido «lejos o desconectados» de su padre, que pueden hacer las paces, que este es un acto que nace del corazón, que podemos hacerlo una y otra vez a lo largo de nuestra vida y que los que ya son padres o desean serlo, puedan modelar en sus hijos un comportamiento sano, de crecimiento, de amistad, respeto, confianza, valor y entereza.

En mis «20» hice varias búsquedas internas, comenzando por la mismísima decadencia y autodestrucción al salir de la adolescencia y luego una más elevada, que me conectó profundamente con la naturaleza y mi espíritu. Asistí a varios retiros de liderazgo, meditación y chamanismo, donde poco a poco fui sanando la amargura y soledad de mi corazón, hasta convertirla finalmente en alegría, regocijo y felicidad. Y si bien aún me siento en el proceso de sanación, puedo ver hacia atrás el camino recorrido, puedo ver mi niñez y decir gracias.

Hace unos días atrás estábamos ordenando una estantería llena de libros antiguos, fotocopias y carpetas con hojas. Entre todo esto encontré una antigua fotografía, donde estabas enseñándome a caminar cuando yo tenía 1 año de edad, aproximadamente. Rápidamente la tomé y la guardé, me fui a otra habitación y lágrimas comenzaron a brotar de mis ojos, un sentimiento profundo y muy real se estaba apoderando de mí. Era una mezcla de tristeza y felicidad que me inundaba y me llenaba. «Mi papá, mi papito», pensé en ese momento, e incluso ahora que lo escribo, vuelvo a sentirme igual. Una emoción contenida quizás por muchos años. Esto es tan potente, que pensé en compartirlo, al comienzo por redes sociales, pero, realmente elegí darle un espacio en mi Blog, ya que no quiero que se pierda en el devenir de la comunicación digital inmediatista y que pueda obtener cierta permanencia, no sólo por razones terapéuticas, sino que por motivos de trascendencia.

Si esto me ha afectado a mí, también podría estar afectando de igual, menor o mayor manera a otros hombres en este planeta. Y siento un llamado fundamental a compartir esta experiencia con ustedes y que les sirva de la mejor manera en su desarrollo humano.

No quiero centrarme en teorías psicológicas, sobre el desarrollo del autoestima, o de la importancia de sanar las relaciones con nuestra figura paterna y materna, respectivamente. Ya que prefiero que sea un escrito cargado de emoción y de verdad humana. Y que haya un contexto de integración, sincero y profundo.

papa y yoEn este artículo, quiero decirte que me siento conmovido totalmente por esta imagen nuestra, donde me sujetas de los brazos y me ayudas a dar mis primeros pasos. Me doy cuenta, de cómo has continuado haciéndolo, siempre a tu manera, hasta el mismo día de hoy. Quiero decirte que puedo reconocer y ver todo el esfuerzo y el sacrificio que has puesto en el desarrollo mío y de mis hermanos. Puedo ver tu sufrimiento como hombre, puedo ver tus errores, puedo ver tu humanidad vulnerable, y sobre todo esto, puedo ver el inmenso e ilimitado amor que me has dado, hasta el día de hoy.

Quiero honrarte porque quiero que seamos amigos, quiero que te puedas apoyar en mí, quiero me ayudes a crear un nuevo mundo, donde los hombres y mujeres, honran a sus padres y los amen, en donde los padres y madres del mundo, honren y amen a sus hijos, y la sabiduría inmensa del amor, los guíe a tomar las mejores decisiones posibles.

Quiero decirte que te dedico mi trabajo, mi vida, mi legado. Por que, gracias a ti estoy vivo y soy quien soy. Por eso te dedico mis éxitos y victorias. Sé que puedo compartir contigo también mis fracasos, mis metidas de pata y que me escucharás y estarás ahí para mí. Porque tú estás en mi corazón para siempre, estamos juntos, Padre e hijo, amigos, guerreros y hombres sabios y sensibles, artistas, viajeros del mundo interior.

Que este homenaje se impregne en nuestro espíritu, que nos devuelva la fortaleza perdida, que nos llene de energía positiva y poderosa y que se extienda a todos los padres e hijos que por cualquier causa, lo necesiten. Estoy seguro que si todos nos atrevemos a reconocer nuestro dolor y nos entregamos a nuestra vulnerabilidad, es nuestra fortaleza interna la que se maximiza, que reconocer nuestras heridas, sólo nos puede volver mejores. Que la verdadera sanación viene del espíritu indomable, puro, como el de un caballo que corre libre por las praderas. Que con su fuerza interna y su liderazgo natural, se entrega a la vida misma.

Hoy es nuevo día, y el sol nos muestra el camino, hacia el mañana que queramos recorrer.

Te amo Papá.